|
Post by garrett on Sept 1, 2011 10:16:39 GMT -5
i know us guys participate...but you wimmins has secret abilities and better organization and different priorities? wanna share? or jest what the kiddos is doin in general?
|
|
|
Post by marielouise on Sept 10, 2011 8:35:15 GMT -5
Grandkids are great! spoil em and send em home. Called paybacks for alllll the hoooey dem bratty kidds of mine pulled thru the years. Hee heeee!
|
|
|
Post by garrett on Sept 10, 2011 22:28:45 GMT -5
lol payback ml....................
|
|
|
Post by fulenn on Sept 30, 2011 17:55:55 GMT -5
We're really lucky down here. Kids aren't bratty, not even the teenagers. The only thing I might change is I might have 1 or 2 more since they have been so good.
My tip: be consistent. Okay, another tip: when they ask a question, answer them so thoroughly and in so much detail that there is no question in their mind about what the answer is; they will never ask that question again.
Fulenn
|
|
|
Post by fulenn on Sept 30, 2011 17:58:35 GMT -5
I've got to say, when we had one set of grandparents try the spoiling and sending home thing with our children, we quit letting them visit. It took care of the problem quickly. In our case, it was the grandparents that were the problem. lol Not insinuating anything, ML. I know you are joking around. I just still get upset when I think about the things they would do. Fulenn
|
|
|
Post by roziedozie on Sept 30, 2011 19:33:27 GMT -5
Main tip: love 'em and encourage them, set limits, give them what they need, i.e., good food served on time, a regular bed time, chores, a time for play, a time for learning, alone time with parents and don't sweat the little stuff.
I think its Ax that talks about Maslow all the time but he absolutely right. If you want kids to grow emotionally, then basic needs have to come first.
Lot's of behavior problems happen because kids are thirsty, hungry (their blood sugar is fragile) or tired.
If you put them on a 3 hour eating/snacking/drinking schedule, make sure they go to bed on time and get enough sleep (nap if they need it) and make sure they get lots of big motor/muscle activity (exercise, outdoors) and lots of little motor, creative activity (drawing, singing, cooking, hammering, sand papering), along with lots of hugs, encouragment, and undivided attention, they will be FINE.
|
|
|
Post by fulenn on Sept 30, 2011 22:26:51 GMT -5
Rozie, what a great post! I didn't know that Ax talked about Maslow, but I am a teacher and that is exactly what I and the other teachers tell the parents: your children have to get enough sleep, food, and have the emotional security and support that they need in order to move on to the business of learning. Same thing with child-rearing: meet their basic needs and they can learn the other things that we have to share with them.
Fulenn
|
|
|
Post by roziedozie on Oct 1, 2011 19:25:20 GMT -5
Rozie, what a great post! I didn't know that Ax talked about Maslow, but I am a teacher and that is exactly what I and the other teachers tell the parents: your children have to get enough sleep, food, and have the emotional security and support that they need in order to move on to the business of learning. Same thing with child-rearing: meet their basic needs and they can learn the other things that we have to share with them. Fulenn Fulenn, I'm a teacher too, or was for a number of years. What do you teach? Maslow was a pretty smart guy. When I first taught back in the 60's, (seems likes thousands of years ago), poor children came to school hungry and many had no lunch, either. There were no free b'fast and lunch programs. My sister just retired from teaching 30 plus years in one of the poorest school districts in the nation. She started giving her students juice, milk, fruit, and peanut butter sandwiches on whole wheat bread (from her own pocket) between meals and their test scores and learning rate improved dramatically. If you're hungry or malnourished you cannot pay attention.
|
|
|
Post by fulenn on Oct 2, 2011 0:05:10 GMT -5
I teach gifted and talented students in grades 1-8; I teach all of the core classes and whatever else gits with that. It is a great job and I absolutely love doing it! This is only my 9th year teaching, but I worked in public mental health until my 30s and then was fortunate enough to be able to stay home with my children for several years. So I am not a young teacher. Fulenn
|
|
|
Post by fulenn on Oct 3, 2011 20:20:57 GMT -5
Rozie, what did you and your sister teach? what grades? Do you miss it now?
Fulenn
|
|
|
Post by w8n4dave on Oct 4, 2011 7:31:35 GMT -5
Ohhhh teenage years!!! I remember when my 15 year old daughter came home and asked if she could get her bellie button peirced, Of course I said no!! But then I had a change of heart, I told her she could ask Busha (Daves mom) if she said yes , then she could have it done. Of course she went behind my back and had it done. She forgot she is like her mom and is allergic to nickle , and it wasn't long she had to show me the infection so I could take her to the Dr. We laugh about that. yes she has a daughter now I cannot w8!!!
|
|
|
Post by catgrass on Jan 4, 2012 15:32:30 GMT -5
Rozie, your info is right on! My son is 27 now, a Capt. in the AF and doing well. I/we did all those things. Good food, go to bed ON TIME, and outside to play, explore, get dirty. One of the kids that lived down the street from us spent a lot of time at our house. His dad (who knows where Mom was!)mostly let him and his brother raise themselves. They moved, and he got into trouble. Hadn't seen him since he was 11. He came around a few months ago to tell me how much he loved me and spending time at our house (which was a lot!). And, what a rotten father his dad was. Love, encouragement and food go a long way!
|
|
|
Post by grammy on Jan 4, 2012 19:29:20 GMT -5
Love, Consistency and Boundaries.
|
|
|
Post by garrett on Jan 4, 2012 19:36:08 GMT -5
Love, Consistency and Boundaries. smiles................
|
|
|
Post by garrett on Mar 10, 2012 15:06:41 GMT -5
keep em gardening.lol
|
|
|
Post by nightmist on Mar 12, 2012 17:14:47 GMT -5
Another basic thing...
Some days you are the poo, and other days you are just poo.
One day you could be Mom Almighty. You can do no wrong. Everything goes perfectly and you could stand on your head and juggle that child with your feet and they would still think you are the most perfect being on earth and follow your every word like gospel.
The next day nothing you do is right. You could serve brownie sundaes for breakfast while dressed like Mickey Mouse and they will complain and grump and possibly wail. No matter what you say they will go and do the exact opposite.
This is perfectly normal. Don't let it get you down. The natural contrariness of children may have been put in them just to keep us humble.
|
|
|
Post by garrett on Mar 13, 2012 1:10:39 GMT -5
grins
|
|
|
Post by bluelacedredhead on Mar 13, 2012 8:27:58 GMT -5
Duct Tape
|
|
bella
New Member
Posts: 6
|
Post by bella on Mar 13, 2012 14:43:25 GMT -5
Then there's the teen years.........
|
|
|
Post by nightmist on Mar 13, 2012 17:09:47 GMT -5
That is when you use the duct tape.
|
|
|
Post by bluelacedredhead on Mar 13, 2012 19:39:30 GMT -5
Naw, he was a pretty quiet kid. It's his Mother that was the rowdy one
|
|
|
Post by garrett on Mar 18, 2012 9:41:39 GMT -5
grins
|
|
|
Post by garrett on Mar 28, 2012 1:07:42 GMT -5
so far so good.lol
|
|
|
Post by marielouise on Mar 29, 2012 6:29:23 GMT -5
The main thing with teens is to listen---really listen instead of blowing your top and lecturing --- listen not with just your ears but also your eyes and heart -- watch their body language-- , and pick your battles wisely. Set your emotions and pride aside and listen to them. By the time they are teens you should be able to read their quirks, their facial expressions, their fidgeting, body movements and eye contact or lack of, all are indications of telling the truth or avoiding the truth,, use those gut instincts you have, as to when they're fudgeing on details , that's where your BS meter comes in . Listen and ask questions in a non confrontation manner let them talk --you listen and nudge them on... Many times they aren't lying per say but not telling the whole story just bits and parts --and those bits and parts they are not saying can be the important . There's a lot of confusing ideas, emotions and loyalties, rights and wrongs , going on with them during their teens things get blown out of proportion quite easily by them or others involved. They need you to keep your head and help them figure out whats the right and wrong way to go. and what they need to do to make it right..
All the books or methods and such help but keep in mind each child is different, an individual..
|
|
|
Post by w8n4dave on Mar 29, 2012 10:00:45 GMT -5
With teens I think it is important to be very close to your children, You need them to be able to talk to you, still be their parent tho....Never give up on them, no matter how hard they make it for you.. Because remember "They know everything" ..... They will appreciate the fact that no matter how hard they made it for you , you never gave up... They need the guidance and boundaries even tho at times they think they don't... You will start getting grey hair .. but in the end when they get married and have their own children their lil light in their head goes on and they want to be the best mom and dad ever They have turned into you and you can set back and LOVE it!! You don't need to spoil and send home as a grand parent you need to hug and love and listen and play with them .... maby have some M&M's something special so when they come over they will say can we have some of that?? At our house it is M&M's and chocolate milk THey know when they come to Dreama's and Papa's they get M&M's and chocolate Milk It's all good .....
|
|